Things Women Shouldn’t Let Slide

By Lisa Xing
[Relationships]
How do you decide what’s okay and what’s out of the question?  Lisa Xing tells you what you shouldn’t be okay with when it comes to your significant other.
Despite all the grey areas and the blurred lines between acceptable and unacceptable, there are certain things no women should ever really stand for in a relationship, especially if it’s one that you’re hoping will work in the long term.  These are just clear signs that he’s bad company.  You can probably discuss some of them together and attempt to resolve the issue, but others are dealbreakers.  Use this as a guideline, because every relationship is different and people are all different too.

Verbal Abuse

Verbal abuse is probably one of the most overlooked relationship no-nos.  Even worse, it’s not only overlooked, many people don’t recognize the signs of this type of abuse, because it regularly happens during arguments or it is brushed off.  For example, during an especially bad breakup, my boyfriend at the time angrily said some things I won’t repeat here that no woman should ever hear, under any circumstances.  I did not realize this at the time, because it was an emotional time for the both of us.  I didn’t recognize it as a sign to immediately break it off and continued to get engaged in the situation.  Only months after, upon a lot of reflection, did I realize it was completely unhealthy and uncalled for.  Pay attention to the things he says to you and if you have any doubts, it may be valuable to talk to a confidante about it.

He Always Lets You Pay

Despite it being a modern world with modern relationship rules, it is just wrong if he always lets you foot the tab.  The guidelines are more blurred as a relationship progresses, but early on, he should at least be making an effort to pay for the bill, whether it’s dinner or any other date.  There is nothing wrong with you picking up the tab once in a while or even every other date—this shows you can hold your own in the relationship—but if he is letting you do it all the time, it might be time to evaluate this guy’s intentions.
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