Message From Mars: What Men Think Of Condoms

By Matthew Stefanson
[Message From Mars]
Why should men not necessarily be trusted to provide the condoms?  Matthew Stefanson reveals how and why men use condoms.
These days, you don't have to have a baby.  Science has stepped in and basically taken that risk away from us by introducing the condom.  The condom is a wonderful tool.  It helps protects us from all of the bad parts of sex—at least the biological ones; the emotional and social ramifications can't really be helped—and the best part is that it's finally catching on so that it's normal for two new lovers to reach for a condom before they get into it, at least that's the case in North America.

Due to their prevalence, condoms have become a regular part of the sex act for most people and using them is almost a reflex.  Because of this, they've also become something of a trust exercise for couples, another small escalation in the ranking of your relationship.  That's why we're going to discuss them a little this week.  As a public service Sarah and I will be covering the issue from opposite viewpoints.  If you're a fellow, head over to her column, View From Venus, to see what women think of condoms.  If you're looking for the male viewpoint, this weeks Message From Mars is all about the condom.  All of the male gender's reserved thoughts on the subject are contained hereafter.

The Bearer

There is some dispute amongst the genders as to who should actually carry the condoms.  The answer is, quite simply, everyone.  Every sexually active human being should have a ready supply of condoms or other birth control devices, unless they are trying to get an STI or a baby.

Both genders have unique reasons for claiming the other should carry them.  Men say that women don't appreciate the presumptive nature of a man who carries a condom with him.  They think that he must be expecting them to put out.  Women say that men are the ones who actually use them and should be the ones to carry them.  Each theory has its problems.

Firstly, being prepared isn't the same thing as hooting at a woman on the street.  You're not making untoward assumptions about the woman; you're just prepared for the possibility of genital on genital contact.  And it is a possibility.  One of the many things that humans do together is have sex.  Probability wise, you're bound to just fall into the situation sooner or later, so you might as well be ready.

Secondly, women cannot trust men to have or even use condoms.  There are some shady dudes out there who don't truck with no jimmy hats.  For this reason, you should have a supply and insist on your partners using it if you're unsure about their history.

Pro vs. Con

The male community is of two minds about condoms.  We like their long-term results, but don't so much care for their immediate effects.

Condoms, no matter how thin they are or how much they're advertised to enhance sensation, are barriers and as such they do impair feeling.  The simple fact is that sex feels better without a condom.  It's like trying to type with a mitten on; you lose a good deal of sensation.  However, this is not an insurmountable hurdle by any means.  Some men will try to tell you that they just can't have sex with a condom on because it absolutely ruins the experience.  They aren't necessarily lying.  They probably have themselves convinced that this is true.  They are, however, deluded and obsessed with the care, use and worship of their genitals.  Condoms do not destroy the tactile facilities of your penis, unless you've dulled your nerves with the unorthodox application of illegal drugs, which some people have.
 Realistically, you can wear a condom and enjoy your sexual experience almost as much as you would have without it.  And if you are someone who doesn't want a horrifying disease or a baby, it's a good policy to strap one on.
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