Every person I know who has been in a long-term relationship has experienced rough patches that come from having busy lifestyles and not being able to spend enough time together.  The couples who make it through are the ones who accept the problem and try to come up with solutions, not the ones who deny that a problem exists.  So how can you overcome this issue if a lack of time together is threatening your relationship?

Let The Little Things Go

While your partner may have idiosyncrasies that drive you crazy, waiting until you see him or her to get something off your chest is a bad idea if you don’t spend much time together.  I can almost guarantee that you will end up getting into a fight that will ruin your date night.  Wasting time arguing just isn’t helpful, and you know it’s time you really can’t afford to waste.  It will only drive a wedge between you and could take hours or even days to resolve.

If something really bothers you and you can’t let it go, bring it up in a non-confrontational way.  Let him or her know what they did and why it upset you, then wait to hear their side.  Save these discussions for when you are calm and rational and try not to let them escalate into a full-scale argument.  If your partner sees that you are keeping your cool, chances are greater that he or she will mimic your actions and respond to you in the same manner.  He or she is also more likely to give you a truthful answer instead of just getting defensive and closed off.

Be Creative

Just because you don’t have a lot of time doesn’t mean you can’t see each other for brief intervals.  Take a special trip over to your partner’s place on your way home from work or while you’re running errands.  Or spontaneously stop by his or her workplace to take them to lunch (assuming they don’t work too far away, of course).  These surprise dates will keep your relationship interesting and draw you closer together.  Finding more time to talk equals a stronger, healthier relationship.

A great way to ensure you are communicating well is to talk every night before bed.  No matter what your schedules are, talking every night gives you both a chance to share your day at a time when you are relaxed.