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10 Minutes That Will Transform Your Relationship

By Sarah Stefanson

[10 Minutes]

What simple act can improve your relationship in a short amount of time? Sarah Stefanson outlines the benefits of a good cuddle.

Many men simply don’t see the point of cuddling. Post sex they would rather just turn over and go to sleep. They can’t seem to comprehend why it’s so important to their girlfriends or wives to spend time canoodling. The fact is that cuddling is one of the most beneficial things you can do for your relationship. Making time for a 10 minute cuddle once a day will help you be a closer, more connected couple.

Cuddling Chemicals

When you cuddle with your partner, feel good hormones are released in your brain. One of these chemicals is oxytocin, which is so important in the process that it is sometimes referred to as the cuddling hormone. Oxytocin promotes pair bonding, a stuffy, scientific way to describe the closeness that occurs between a couple in love. The evolutionary benefit of pair bonding is that a female will be more confident that the male will be attached to her and willing to help her raise their young. It also makes the male less likely to stray. This concept applies to the mating habits of nearly all species and, although humans have a much more complex web of reasons for wanting to be together, the idea of maintaining a strong bond with your partner in order to raise children is still a primary drive for many of us. Even if you aren’t planning on having kids anytime soon (or ever), the connectedness that is promoted by cuddling can improve your relationship and make you glad to be together.

Sleepy Time

Brain chemicals also play a role in a man’s tendency to want to go to sleep after sex instead of staying up for a cuddle. When a man has an orgasm, chemicals are released in his brain which are associated with sleep and this triggers the beginning of the recovery time many men require between sex sessions. Due to these sleepy chemicals, immediately following sex may not be the best time for cuddling. Ladies, some of you are going to have to come to terms with this fact. Guys, why not try instigating some cuddling time when she least expects it? It will mean a lot more to her if you just want to cuddle and it’s not connected to sex. Curl up on the couch with her in front of the TV. If she’s feeling stressed, suggest that you settle down into a quick cuddle.

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