Have you met the man of your dreams only to find out he’s years younger than you?  Stacey Noronha tells you the good and bad of dating a younger man.I recently had the good fortune to meet this fabulous guy who is everything I could want in a man.  He’s smart, extremely sensitive, ambitious, a whole lot of funny and is absolutely adorable.  Not to mention, he can deliver one of the sweetest kisses I’ve been lucky to have ever received.

Sadly, as with any good thing in life, this situation also has an unfortunate circumstance.  He’s four years younger than me!  Now to most this might not seem like much of a problem, except he’s currently 20 and I’m 24.  For us it’s probably not the actual number as much as it is the place in life in which we each find ourselves.  He’s in college, working part-time and having loads of fun on the weekends.  I’m moving towards grad school, working at a ‘proper’ job and hope to get married in the next three years or so.  Could a relationship like this even work?  Here are some pros and cons.

The Pros

Carpe Diem and Then Some

Younger guys seem to have more spontaneity and seize-the-day mentality than some of us older folks can dream of.  They can be up for anything on a moment’s notice, which can also mean that sometimes they may be more romantic.  Wouldn’t you like to be whisked away on a romantic getaway?  This impulsive attitude means trying a whole lot of new things and breaking out of your comfort zone.  Carpe Diem!

Smith and Samantha

Younger men tend to be more open to strong women.  You are fabulous with your happening career, your very own hip apartment and that Birkin bag you take out for special occasions.  The boyfriend, on the other hand, may be living with four other guys in a matchbox downtown, but he is totally happy with all that.  I’ve noticed that younger men are absolutely comfortable with an independent woman.  All of us who see ourselves as more of a Samantha than a Charlotte can now rejoice.  Younger men tend to get the reality of what women are truly like in society today; they have a mind of their own.

Like a Duracell Battery

Are younger men really that great in bed?  Well for what its worth, friends have said that the answer is yes.  They have more energy and passion and, more importantly, they are up to trying new things and learning from you.  After all, most likely, you would be the one with more experience here.  Many women I know today want an uncomplicated relationship with a lot of fun, passion and sexual chemistry.

The Cons

Before His Time

I found myself mentioning cartoons, songs and even bands that he had only vaguely heard of.  I realized that while I was 8 and watching Full House he was 4 and playing with Pokemon.  Even though at first the time warp does shock you a little, use this as an opportunity to maybe teach him a thing or two about your childhood.  Watch re-runs of your favourite TV shows together or even rent a movie that brings back memories of high school.  But this goes both ways.  Remember to keep an open mind to his music, movies and shows as well.

If There’s a Beavis, There’s a Butthead

You must realize that even if your man is mature and sophisticated, his friends just might not be.  Keggers and partying until the wee hours of the morning are major possibilities.  I would suggest just going with the flow and living a little.  Accept his friends, because at the end of the day, you knew this was part of the territory when dating the hot 25-year-old from the gym!

Tick, Tock, Tick, Tock

Commitment, marriage and children have scared more than a few men no matter what their age, but when you feel your biological clock ticking and he doesn’t, that may cause a rift in the relationship.  If children are extremely important, I recommend bringing it up, but definitely not in the first few months.  Take the time to get to know each other and then summon up the courage and ask.

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so where does this leave you?

At the end of the day, love is love and if you are one of the lucky ones that gets to find it, then I don’t think anything should stop you.  A few years will not make a difference when you’re old and turn over in bed one morning to see his face.  Granted it may have slightly less wrinkles, but he’ll still have the heart that you fell in love with.

Does this mean I’m going to give my young one a chance?  I just might.