How To Use Online Dating Services

By Jason Bigman
[Personals]
Creating A Profile

Your profile is the identity you create to let people know about you and about what type of person and/or relationship you seek. Again, you want to take certain precautions in creating the profile to ensure your safety and privacy. Do not give your last name. You may want to use a code name (this can match the one you used for your special email account, but it does not need to).

If you are looking for someone in your local area, you can give the broad general area of where you live, but don't be too specific. For instance, stating "I live in the Toronto, ON area" is probably better than "I live in the Annex area of Toronto" or "I live within walking distance of the Eglinton subway station."

Beyond these few guidelines, the sky is the limit in terms of what you might say in crafting your profile.

Now we get to the fun stuff – the online meetings.
 
Looking For Love

Once you have created a profile, the excitement truly begins. It is time to start meeting new people. You can chat online, exchange e-mail, and more. As you begin to meet people, be cautious about giving out too much personal information, such as your last name, your phone number at home or at work, or the neighborhood in which you live. Make sure you have gotten to know someone well – that you have talked to him or her long enough, and enough times, to feel it is safe – before you give out any such information.

This should really be common sense but I emphasize it for one very important reason. It is very easy to get swept away in a good conversation. You need to keep your head on straight and bear in mind that with all the benefits of dating from your living room, come the disadvantages of anonymity.

Enough about the negatives. Let’s imagine that you’ve spoken online, exchanged pictures and all is going well. The next step is the first phone call.
  
The Phone Call

Still in my cautionary mode, let’s say you want to talk on the phone but don’t want to divulge your number. It’s hopeless you think? You underestimate me.

Try asking the other person to give you his/her number, rather than giving out your own. If you call from home, make sure to block Caller ID for your outgoing call, (look in your local phone book to learn how to do this).

Alternatively, you can call from a payphone or public place. I would strongly suggest that you do not call from work or give out your work number until you know a person well, and feel sure that this person is safe.

The First Date

If you are serious about finding someone for dating or romance, there is a general progression that most people follow in getting to know someone they have met on the Internet: First they chat online, then they speak on the phone, then they meet in person. I would suggest that you have several conversations by email or chat, and at least one phone conversation before deciding to meet in person. Trust your intuition.

Okay, so suppose that you have met someone online, you have communicated by email and/or chats, then spoken on the phone, and you feel ready to meet this person face to face. What next?
 
Choose a public place to meet, such as a restaurant, café, or coffee shop. A daytime date is preferable for the first date. Choose a time when you know that there will be other people around. Do not have this person pick you up at your house and do not offer to pick this person up for the first date. Have your own means of transportation so that if you feel uncomfortable, you have the option to leave whenever you wish to do so.

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e-dating

Out of all the tips I’ve given you, the most important one would be to trust your instincts. Dating is a fun process and you don’t want to be bogged down with rules and precautions. Most of the people you meet will be safe, likely with all the same thoughts as you. Just keep an open mind and you’ll do fine.
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